The untold TRUTH

Have you ever wonder why Syahid is always crazy? Why is he loud? Why is he care-free?

Well, he is just putting a brave front to forget all unhappiness moments. Thus, not to affect others with the negative feelings he had.

He was asked by friends that said why are you so noisy? Why are you loud? Why are you losing your mind? WHY THIS, WHY THAT?!!

WHY BOTHER ASKED ME WHEN YOU ARE NOT AS PERFECT AS WELL?!!

I was just trying to cover up my points, my agony, my pain.. I dont wish to bring myself down dragging them in. I want to bring colours to my world since I am colour-blind. I want to see my friends around me smiles. I want their world fills with warm and love. However, no one understand my world, my thinking, my heart. I want to run freely, fly across the sky, dive in deep clear sea, jump with joy and dance gracefully but I hope for a soul that would appear awaiting and smiling a me at the end of the day. A soul that would surround me whole-heartedly. Touches my cracked heart and mend it with love. Gave me a sense of security, belonging and comfort. A place that I would always be when I need someone. A reason to live and a reason to feel. Hopes and bliss.

Tears are sacred if sincere and love are form. Yet it brought pain and blood. So never ask Syahid this question " what are you?" I will never answer you and you are just like the rest of the feelingless arseholes! I had set my mind to not bother about these people who asked. SO DONT ASK WHY.

Whether or not I am or not. It does not concerns you. It does not kill you. If you would still love me as a friend, all I asked for is your sincerelity and understanding. It hurts me to explain who I am as I am confused.

I would want to say His name but I was stopped by my own will. I had framed His name in my mind and illustrated His image in my fantasy.

Subtle and deep. Passionate and truth. Beauty and Sweet.

Why cant it be simplier?

Seriously why?

My first love was a simple girl who God brought to my hand with simplity of honesty and sweet memoirs. A forbidden garden of eve without pain but just beauty and paintings of green scenaries and landscapes with tiny mystical creatures and butterflies.

She was named 'Christie'. A very simple, innocent, intellectual soul that I adored with all my heart. I love her tenderously and could only picture her as my wife. Only her among other girls that I had come across. This name portrays the world with her smile and sincerity creates colours to her surrounding. Its like an Angel that paint the earth with her wings.

She is the only one.

He was there. He gave that sense of security, that wonderful feelings, that eyes. Sparkles from deep inside and sweetness till the max that is appreciated only from a sweet tooth like myself. The touch of gold melted my heart and soul leaving only bones. I cried that green eyes bestow upon me seeing a stone that He hold whole-heartedly. I feel safe around His presence and love when He sparkled His smile. When He could not sleep, He thinks of me and gave His blessings thru the night to guard my sleep in peace. He was named '...' (I could not do it)

No matter what it may be.. I will always give my blessings.

You are the Wind that dances the trees and grasses,

I am just a Stone that will not be bothered by anyone.

You swept the world with unseenable breeze,

I am still unnoticeable and dirty.

You are loved and flaunted by many

and I wait secretly..