Achmed the Dead Terrorist (Xmas Special)

Dashing through the sand

with a bomb strapped to my back.

I have a nasty plan

for Christmas in Iraq.

I got through checkpoint A,

but not through checkpoint B.

That's when I got shot in the ass

by the US Military...

[it's not funny!]

Oooh, jingle bombs, jingle bombs

Mine blew up you see.

Where are all the virgins

that Bin Laden promised me?

Oooh, jingle bombs, jingle bombs

U.S. soldiers shot me dead.

The only thing that I have left

is this towel up on my head.

I used to be a man,

but every time I cough,

thanks to Uncle Sam,

my nuts keep falling off.

My bombing days are done.

I need to find some work.

Perhaps it would be much safer

as a convenient store night clerk.

Oooh, jingle bombs, jingle bombs

I think I got screwed.

Don't laugh at me because I'm dead

or I'll kill you...

I KILL YOUOUOU!