Let me speak

Firstly,
i wish to thank every single one of you who wishes me this 21st birthday.
I appreciate it really.
All the small little gifts are kindly adored.

Winson: Thank you bro for surprising me at that

early morning just to wish me,

with the T-shirt & keychain as well.

I love them.

Edwin: Thank you for COMING to see me and appreciate

the T-shirt as well.

The unexpected little surprise-plans that drives me to speechless.

Xinning: Thank you for giving me a moment of confusion that shocked me,

the planning of the chalet & BBQ.

The simple little time that you have for me.

Khim: Thank you for the Saturday. The shopping,

dinner, chillings and laughters.

And to all the others who were there to celebrate this day of freedom.

Thank you once more.

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Secondly,

i wish to say a few or perhaps quite a far fetch of moments which i been thinking.

This may sound bad but i wish to express my thoughts and what i feel. I am greatful to God, my mum and to all who have been there for me all these years. Really am!

However, perhaps i might think too much or quite of a bitch to say this. I love what i received and yes! its all about the thoughts, but if its about the thoughts? Am i wrong to say these few sentences about me being a friend? What i want to say is - i really hope to receive what i had give. Let me elaborate more.

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I am always the one who planned something interesting to friends who i love. Something like having a picnic, etc.. something different, unique. I always gave the best out of the best like the most expensive cakes although i might be penniless. Although it might be small but i love to give what i think he/she deserves to have. Sometime i wish to bake the cake personally. I'm not asking alot for this.. i just thought wouldnt it be nice if it would be something different for me? Giving something good to show how appreciate i am to them. Thus sadly i dont feel the love or am i really that appreciated by them? Last year i received a cake from an under the block bakery shop and i just wondered.. am i this simple? I'm really sorry but the cake tasted really bad.. BUT i am greatful for the effort.

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It would be better if it was home-made, if its bad at least i know the sweetness in you. I am really sorry if this may sound fuck-up or "cheebye face" of me but pleaseee.. save your money if its just for .." its his birthday, lets just get any cake.." I know how expensive cakes can be priced or perhaps its all about the thoughts.. but if the thoughts are really a sincere thoughts, get a better choice. To me, a birthday cake should be an artpiece/gourmet that you love the most by whoever that bought it. If not.. dont get it. It should be appreciated and consuming it will enhance the atmosphere.

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I had gave what i always love, even my cakes are search for perfection.

Whatever it is, i am still grateful to those who did all this with or without thinking.

The chalet was good, the food was fine, the atmosphere was simple.

I like it =)

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And thank you for coming down for me. With just only 17 ppl, i am happy for their presence.

All i want is your time. Your time for me. I dont need any chalet, food, all the gifts, cakes or just by chipping in.. i want your presence. For those who did chipped in without turning up, I am very disappointed in you.. really am. This shows how much i am to you. Is it so hard to just give me your little time?! really? Is it? If you ask me, am i happy? I would honestly said "i'm sorry, i am utterly devastated."

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Taking away all.. chalet, gifts, food, cakes.. with nothing. I WOULD BE DELIGHTED IF IT IS JUST YOURSELF. If i can give myself to find a time to do something for you.. cant you?

ok.. whatever la.

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Its over. 22 jan had passed. Soon enough i'll be 22. This time dont bother do anything. I'll just buy my cake and eat myself.

Anyway.. Thank you Winson for the first to see me. Xinning for planning the surprise. Edwin for appearing once again, Quincy for being there always, Khim for appreciating me

To Ben, Linda, Mallory, Nelly, Steph, Sheena, some random guy, Steven, Zai and Jolene for your precious moments =)

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I shall go sleep now and forget whatever it is.

It's my fault for being creative.